A True Supporter

The past 3 years have been truly horrendous, confronting, frustrating, confusing….. I’ve desperately searched for true supporters – people who can:

  • meet me where I’m at
  • acknowledge what’s happening
  • help me to try and make sense of things
  • address or help me let go of the burdens
  • reveal strategies forward
  • provide prayerful support
  • stick with me to see the victory come to pass

Recently I’ve had events that have rocked me. I had 2 confusing and hurtful interactions with medical professionals. After the first event, I felt the shock starting to set in and I stood on the pavement and declared: “God that door has slammed in my face, BUT I trust that You’ve closed that door for a reason and so once again I’ll place my trust in You!”.

As I processed that incident another one, less than a week later, had me in a state of despair feeling ‘attacked’ for no reason! I felt ‘kicked’ when I was ‘down for the count’!

I am so grateful for a loving constantly supportive husband and family who have stood by me and helped me so much. BUT the weeks after those incidents I’ve been unable to connect face to face with my 2 sources of group prayer support. As I struggled with the feelings of isolation and loneliness I delved into the study of Jehovah Nissi.

This description of God is found in Exodus 17: The Israelites were under attack by warriors of Amalek. Moses commanded Joshua to go and fight them, promising that he would stand on top of the hill holding the staff of God in his hand. When Moses had his arms raised the Israelites had the advantage but whenever he dropped his hand the Amalekites gained the advantage. As the battle raged on poor Moses grew exhausted. Aaron and Hur came along and sat Moses on a stone and then stood each side of him to hold up his arms. This enabled them to endure until sunset. The result was that Joshua and the Israelites were victorious. To mark this event “Moses built an altar there and named it Yahweh-Nissi (which means “the Lord is my banner”).” Exodus 17:15 NLT

What a powerful testimony of partnership with God as well as others. This study has reminded me that God is mighty! God is by my side. As I wrote this a deep realisation sunk into my soul that GOD IS MY TRUE SUPPORTER – He is the One who has been there through it all.

God’s banner of love; mercy; grace; healing; restoration; transformation; and victory is over me!

God is calling me forth unafraid for He will strengthen me for the battle.

God is calling me to be bold because He is so much bigger than my current circumstances.

Jesus’ extravagant sacrifice for me started on the cross and then extended to my salvation and my healing. So I shouldn’t be surprised when it extends to the promised victory!

For I’m promised that in the days to come “….no weapon turned against you will succeed. You will silence every voice raised up to accuse you. These benefits are enjoyed by the servants of the Lord; their vindication will come from me. I, the Lord, have spoken!” Isaiah 54:17 NLT

How cool is that!!

My prayer: So right now Lord I ask for forgiveness over my unbelief! Grow my faith. I’ve prayed so many wonderful promises, now I move my heart to receive them as REALITY. I declare Your banner over me IS love; grace; mercy; victory; and provision! Lord I breathe into reality Your promises for me! I step out in faith towards ALL You call me to!!! All Your promises ARE YES and AMEN. Lord let Your will be done!

“May God give you every desire of your heart and carry out your every plan as you go into battle. When you succeed, we will celebrate and shout for joy. Flags will fly when victory is yours! Yes, God will answer your prayers and we will praise Him!” Psalms 20:4-5 The Passion Translation

Many blessings!

‘God of the Angel Armies’ – Jonathan David & Melissa Helser – YouTube clip

‘Whom Shall I Fear’ [God of Angel Armies] – Chris Tomlin – YouTube lyrics clip

‘OVERFLOW’ – Official Planetshakers – YouTube Music Video

‘The Stand’ – Hillsong United – YouTube subtitled lyrics clip

Picture Cred: freestockpro.com

 

My Rollercoaster Week

I’m not really sure what to share and it all feels a bit disjointed but here is my heart for you this week……….. snippets of yet another roller coaster week….

Tuesday last week this was part of my day:

I had a 20 min screaming session as I drove from town….I was so fed up with the constant unending challenges…. I came home and had a prayer session that got LOUD….

Utterly exhausted I went to the beach to try and get some clarity and calm. As I sat there I was challenged to still my racing thoughts (and heart) and worship….

“Worship is an acknowledgement of God’s worth. Whether we are in the biggest loss of our life or the biggest victory, our response remains the same because His worth never changes.” Bill Johnson

I listened to worship music and wrote:

I sit by the water
I drink of You
I absorb Your life-giving water into my entire being
I rest in Your presence
I soak You in
I ignite Your freedom into my heart
I sing of Your love
I sing of Your grace
I sing of Your majesty
I sing of Your glory
Shine Your love on me
Send Your cleansing grace
Clothe me in Your majesty
Let me shine Your glory Lord

Sunday morning I was awake early and after a bit of a wrestle I finally made my way upstairs, reminding myself about being obedient. As I pushed myself up the stairs I thought how cool it would be to hear a kookaburra. As my foot hit the top stair I heard a familiar sound – the kookaburra singing loudly. I raced outside to try and capture it. As I stood on my deck hearing him laugh away I was reminded that in the midst of my storm I can laugh because if I have my eyes fixed on Jesus I’m assured victory!
1 Corinthians 15:57  “…thanks be to God, who gives us the victory [as conquerors] through our Lord Jesus Christ.” Amplified

I am promised to be able to laugh at my future (Proverbs 31) because I’m clothed in strength and dignity and God has a good and perfect plan for my life:
Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.”  New Living Translation

Then Tuesday this week was my teary day….right from the moment I awoke I felt fragile…..as I started to think about stuff I felt as if I was suffocating… I went into the study, played music and wrote:

Lord Please Revive Me
Lord my heart is heavy
Please lift it
My eyes leak with grief
Please catch each one
My worries race towards me like a thousand strong army
Lord please do not leave me to be consumed by them!
Lord this load is too heavy to carry
Please take it
I empty myself
Please come fill me
Lord I need Your words of truth and life to revive me

As I return to the kitchen my daily devotion verse is: “For you are my hiding place; you protect me from trouble. You surround me with songs of victory.” Psalms 32:7 NLT

I grabbed my phone to look up the verse and continued to read: “……..unfailing love surrounds those who trust the Lord. So rejoice in the Lord and be glad, all you who obey him! Shout for joy, all you whose hearts are pure!” Psalms 32:10b-11 NLT

The day was filled with constant moments of me fighting back tears, allowing them to leak or sobbing huge body racking tears!

After tea we watch a movie on Netflix called “Born To Win” based on the true heartbreaking story of Leon Terblanche who asked over and over again “Where is God?”.

As I watch it I feel as if a balm was being placed over my hurting, doubting, fainting, weak and tired heart. In a place of despair a friend of Leon’s comes up to him and recites Isaiah 40: “Look up into the heavens. Who created all the stars? He brings them out like an army, one after another, calling each by its name. Because of his great power and incomparable strength, not a single one is missing. O Jacob, how can you say the Lord does not see your troubles? O Israel, how can you say God ignores your rights? Have you never heard? Have you never understood? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of all the earth. He never grows weak or weary. No one can measure the depths of his understanding. He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Even youths will become weak and tired, and young men will fall in exhaustion. But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:26-31 NLT

I cry out afresh to God to answer my pleas for mercy and bring the promised breakthrough!

I hang on for dear life to the One who is faithful to bring shalom to my chaos!!!

Wednesday (yesterday) I’m encouraged to read this verse: “So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up.” Galatians 6:9 NLT

Lord let me feel Your amazing grace surrounding me – the empowerment to overcome!!

Lord I ask that joy would spring forth in my heart so that I can be a person of peace in the midst of this chaos!

Many blessings!

WARNING!!!! Grab the tissues for this one: Hillsong United – Desert Song (the behind story) YouTube Clip

‘Mountain’ – Bryan & Katie Torwalt – Lyric YouTube clip

Worship In My Chaos inc ‘Enter The Gates’

God’s Peace In Chaos

Last week a dear friend spoke about the word Shalom and she described the word as bringing order to chaos. I loved that! I’ve done a little bit of study and here’s what I’ve found:

Some translations of Shalom according to Strong’s concordance: completeness, soundness, welfare, perfect peace, prosperity, safety, secure…

I haven’t read the full article but what I’ve quickly read seemed really good. Here is an extract and the link:

“Shalom speaks of personal peace, not merely referring to the absence of trouble or conflict, but positively of completeness, wholeness, contentment, welfare, health, prosperity, harmony, and fulfillment. Peace is one of the blessings that flow from a right relationship to God. Shalom is a term that includes all that makes life worthwhile.”

Peace-Shalom (Hebrew Word Study) full article

 

I went on search for peace beyond comprehension. I desperately need God’s order in the midst of my chaos!

  • I’ve researched the word Shalom
  • I have played worship songs almost non-stop
  • I’ve woken early to worship and watch the sunrise
  • I have prayed silently
  • I’ve prayed quietly
  • I have prayed LOUDLY with much force
  • I’ve searched the scriptures for comfort

“Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4: 6-7 New Living Translation (NLT)

I believe that God is in the midst of the chaos all around me!

On Tuesday, as I drove up the hill from my home, I looked up at the clouds and I saw a very unusual pattern. The cloud had formed a handle type formation. I drove as quickly (and safely of course) to the top of the hill to take a photo. But by the time I arrived the cloud was starting to disappear and all that was left was a hook formation.

hook

But then I was reminded that another dear friend had encouraged me, September last year, to be a hook between heaven and earth. This cloud formation spurred me on to be just that!

What is this ‘hook’ idea? Here’s some info for you:

The letter Vav is the sixth letter of the Aleph-Bet, and has the numeric value of six. The pictograph for Vav looks like a tent peg.  The placement of Vav in the Torah – Genesis 1:1 – implies a connection between spiritual matters and earthly matters. Since Vav represents the number six it is associated with man because we were created on the 6th day.

From all that I believe that we are to be the hook between heaven and earth. That our prayers can connect the Spirit with Earth.

I hope that this encourages you to lift your eyes to Heaven and press into God with confidence.

I pray that today you will feel God’s peace surround you. I ask Jesus to dress you in his thoughts of love and peace. I ask the Holy Spirit to surround you with comfort.

Many blessings

Shalom

Celebration of the morning YouTube clip

Keri Weems blog titled “Bringing Order to Chaos: Shalom”

Bible Hub link in regards to Shalom

Link for more about Vav

Shout to the Lord (Revealing Jesus Project) – Darlene Zschech – YouTube Clip

It Is Good · Jonathan David & Melissa Helser – YouTube Clip

I Have Risen (with mini testimony) – Jonathan David Helser – YouTube Clip

Lifestyle Of Worship

To receive love, via my love language, is through words of affirmation and quality time – I love getting messages from people and I love spending time with people.

Guess what was robbed from me when I was sick? The ability to receive affirmation and the ability to spend time with people. My inability to receive God’s love was also distorted! I desperately tried to press into Him but there were many times when I just didn’t feel any connection!

A few months ago I felt a real desire to gift moments to God – set aside specific time regularly to spend it with Him. My love languages, ways I reveal my love, is gift giving and acts of service. I felt that I needed to enter into a space of reckless abandonment in my pursuit for more of God.

“As the deer longs for streams of water, so I long for you, O God.” Psalms 42:1 (NLT)

I was inspired to worship God wholeheartedly like David did, this is described in 2 Samuel 6:14: David danced before the Lord with all his might, with great enthusiasm and with great abandon! NLT, AMP & MSG paraphrased

Jehu Hernandez reflects on David and states: “Worship was giving his life completely to God and to God’s purposes.”

How inspiring and challenging is that!

“Through Him, therefore, let us at all times offer up to God a sacrifice of praise, which is the fruit of lips that thankfully acknowledge and confess and glorify His name.” Hebrews 13:15 Amplified

Sunday, the 7th of May, the sermon was about Mary and Martha! I’m so grateful God has taken me through this deep inner healing. I can boldly declare that striving and distractions are gone in my life! I am no longer a Martha – constantly too busy and distracted by life to engage with God at the level I need to!

Surely a lifestyle of worship should be my response for all that God has done, is doing and will do in my life! I am called to a life of worship because that’s how I’m created to be! I’m not part of the worship team at church, but I am a worshiper! Well how do I worship?

  • I Join creation in singing God’s praises in the morning!
  • I’ll put my earbuds in and play worship music while I clean. My family laugh at me as I make sounds even whales can’t recognize!
  • I’ll play worship music clips on our big tv.
  • I’ll soak in worship music while I write
  • I choose to gift God all I am and all I have!
  • I choose to worship Him in all I do!

God asked me to work on my confidence in Him – to lay down my self-confidence struggles. At first it was go to church early and worship God in His house – kneel, dance, pray through the building…… then it was to go to the beach and worship publicly – raise my hands and sing out loud. I’ve had some people walk past me as I do all this and at first I felt embarrassed! BUT Saturday the 6th of May, as I noticed people walking past, I didn’t feel embarrassed! I hoped that my passionate worship might be contagious and inspiring! As they walked past I blessed them (quietly to myself). It was such a transformation.

At the Majestic Women retreat, early May 2017, I danced – I haven’t been able to dance for ages due to energy issues. I felt prompted again Sunday 7th of May at church, at the end of the service, we went into a time of worship and were encouraged to lay it all down. I felt prompted to dance. As I started I declared: “I’m free to dance and free to sing!!!”. I then danced and sung about God’s freedom flowing like a river and falling like rain. I feel such a shift! Such a release in my life! Oh, I’m just bursting at the seams despite the fact that when I started writing this I was lying on the couch feeling utterly exhausted. I know God has started a HUGE mighty work!!!

In those moments of soaking in God I’m receiving love from God via my love languages – words of affirmation spring forth in my mind and I know God is engaging in spending the time with me! It’s truly astounding!

“I will thank you, Lord, among all the people. I will sing your praises among the nations.” Psalms 57:9 NLT

We are created in Gods image to rule over the earth. When we engage in worshiping God all of creation listens and responds! I hear the birds sing and it seems louder; I see the birds and insects draw near; I often have one or two birds visit with me; I feel the winds respond and a gentle breeze will blow across my face – even when no breeze was felt before!

There are times when it seems difficult to praise but Patricia King puts it all into perspective: “I sense the Lord saying, “Worship though your disappointments.” When you have questions because you do not know the answers, turn your questions into worship…worship in deep surrender and lay your unanswered questions on the altar. He will fill you…heal you…restore hope.”

“Since we are receiving our rights to an unshakable kingdom we should be extremely thankful and offer God the purest worship that delights his heart as we lay down our lives in absolute surrender, filled with awe.” Hebrews 12:28 The Passion Translation

“Never miss an opportunity to dance. Or a reason to laugh. Or a chance to love.” Linda Poindexter

The Passion Translation: “The Hebrew language has meaning attached to every letter, not just every word. Often, the meaning of the word is the combination of the meaning of each individual letter. For example, the Hebrew word for worship (shachah) means to bow down in adoration. It’s the combination of only three letters in Hebrew: shin-chet-hei.

Shin = fiery passion

Chet = joining with God in a secret place or bridal chamber

Hei = in the presence of God”
I’m dancing with exultation and sending you many blessings!

Keona

‘As the Deer Pants’ – Chris & Jennie Orange – lyrics YouTube clip

‘Beautiful Heart’ – Zions Hill & Carolyn Billings -lyrics YouTube clip

‘You have ravished my heart’ – Brian & Jen Johnson – lyrics YouTube clip

‘Resurrecting’ – Elevation Worship – lyrics YouTube clip

Jehu Hernandez complete blog

More about Linda Poindexter

Messy Motherhood

“Being a parent is like folding a fitted sheet. Nobody really knows how to do it properly, we all just wing it.” Posted by: Me.Me – Mum’s grapevine

When folding a fitted sheet my brain says: “I’ll match the corners and then fold here, then here and it’ll be great…….oh it doesn’t matter! It’s clean and it’s in the shelf!”. When it comes to parenting, I have to remind myself: “I love them, they’re alive, so I’m doing great!”.

Having 2 kids 20 months apart was pretty full on to say the least. It was one of the most physically, emotionally and mentally challenging seasons of my life. The chores were unending and constantly overwhelming. The lack of sleep was soul destroying. The constant demands threatened my sanity!

“Parenting is logically complicated, theologically enlightening, and sometimes a bit psychologically destroying.” Ann Voskamp states in her book ‘The Broken Way’.

My dream of being a mum had come true but it was far from the fairy-tale existence I had dreamt up! Others around me made it seem so easy. There is a term so widely used: “you’re such a natural at this!” and I felt far from that! Somehow God did give me the instincts I needed for each child. They were very different right from the start so what had worked for my first child did not always work for my second. It was a constant game of guess and elimination. This ‘game’ continues and escalates into the teen years!

“Motherhood is a daily decision to paint the ordinary moments of our days with the extraordinary love of Christ.” Alicia Bruxvoort

Love is seen in the trying:

  • Trying to say the right things, but feeling like I’ve said too little or too much.
  • Trying to finish work early for that sporting event, but arriving just moments too late.
  • Trying to stay awake to make sure they arrive home safe, but desperately longing for sleep.
  • Trying to cook a meal, but longing to sit on the couch and cry.

But what if the ‘not enough’ is just a lie? AND in fact our efforts, when combined with what God can do, are more than enough!!!!

“Remember: even the smallest drop of God’s strength is more than enough to cover our frailties, our shortcomings, and the places where we deem ourselves weak.” Lysa TerKeurst

What if this is really what love is and looks like:

“Real love dares you to the really dangerous: die in the diminutive. Be broken and given in the small, the moments so small no one may applaud at all. Pour out your life in the laundry rooms and over toilets and tubs, pour out life on the back streets, in the back of the room, back behind the big lights. Pour out your life in small moments – because it’s only these moments that add up to the monumental. The only way to live a truly remarkable life is not to get everyone to notice you, but to leave noticeable marks of His love everywhere you go.” Ann Voskamp

In the tough times I’m constantly reminding myself that my kids are an awesome gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him; they are God’s love-gift; they are heaven’s generous reward. Happy will be the couple who has many of them! Children are like arrows in a warrior’s hands, how joyful is the man whose quiver is full! Your children will have influence and honour to prevail on your behalf so you will never be put to shame!   Psalm 127:3-5 (New Living Translation and The Passion Translation paraphrased)

“He offers me grace, everyday grace, to fill in the gaps of my failures.” Leigh Ann Dutton

Would I change any of those heart-in-my-throat days? In a heartbeat, I’d go back and correct all that I’d done wrong. But I can’t. What I can do is ask for forgiveness for my failings and trust that God’s amazing grace can heal every wrong! I can learn from the past and press forward stronger and wiser than before. Daily seeking God to make me the mother my kids need for this day; this season; this challenge…..
I can rejoice in the now! Truly live the moment and embrace all the goodness it brings.

“The thread of your life becomes a tapestry of abundant colors only if it ties itself to other lives. The only way to strengthen the fabric of society is to let threads of your life break away to let Christ, who is in us, weave around other threads.” Ann Voskamp

My life can become a beautiful tapestry as I weave my life into my family. As we interweave our lives a beautiful family tapestry unfolds!

I’m no longer holding to the label good or bad, instead I’m holding to being an ENDEAVOUR MUM – I’m committed to doing the very best I possibly can, trusting God’s love is big enough to change me; trusting God’s grace is big enough to fill the gaps; and trusting God’s strength is more than enough!

“Real love is in the really small gestures – the way your hands, your feet, move to speak your heart. The way you slow and look right into the eyes of a child every time she speaks so they feel seen and known and safe.” Ann Voskamp

“If you are a mother of any kind, then you are a leader, so wield your influence well.” Sharon Hodde Miller

To my mum and mother-in-law THANK YOU for investing in me! For my grandmothers who are in heaven I am so grateful for the legacy you have left behind. To my sisters, aunts and friends who constantly inspire me to be the mum God wants me to be – THANK YOU!!!

To all the mums out there I say “you’re doing a great job, keep at it!”.

Have a truly special Mother’s Day!

Many, many blessings!

Leigh Ann Dutton’s Motherhood blog

‘The Broken Way: A Daring Path Into the Abundant Life’ by Ann Voskamp – Koorong link

This song has a mini motherhood testimony, enjoy: ‘The Pressure’s Off’ (spontaneous) – Melissa Helser -Bethel Music – YouTube clip

A few power ballads seem appropriate: ‘A Mother’s Love’ – Jim Brickman – YouTube Lyrics clip

‘Mama’ – Spice Girls – YouTube clip

I Turn To You – Christina Aguilera – YouTube clip

 

Time Is

As I journey through my inner healing season I feel like I’m embarking on a new adventure! Entering into a new beginning!

I feel such gratitude that I am given the opportunity to be made whole. I feel thankful for what will unfold.

As Bill Johnson states: “I owe the world a spirit-filled life, for I owe them an encounter with God. Without the fullness of the Holy Spirit in and upon me, I do not give God a surrendered vessel to flow through.”.

During my illness I couldn’t grasp onto and cherish time, it felt as if days dragged by. Sleeping during the day upset my body clock and sometimes I would feel as if I had lived 2 days in the 1.

As I watched the movie “Collateral Beauty” I was impacted by how precious time truly is and I started to reflect on what time is:

Time can rob and destroy
Time can restore and rebuild
Time can be measured
Time can be gifted
Time divides
Time reunites
Time lingers
Time stops
Time races by
Time is a gift
Do I treasure mine?
Do I grasp the moment?
Time is a currency
How do I spend mine?
Is time treasured or simply something I allow to pass?
If my timing is truly in Your hands, my Lord, why is it so hard to wait?
You have seen me in the secret place, Your eyes gazed upon my unformed substance! In Your book is written the days assigned to me, as is declared in Psalm 139:16
Will there come a day when I beg for more time.
Will I long to touch just one more life and see one more miracle unfold?

I love what Ann Voskamp says about time in her book The Broken Way: “For Jesus, time was not something you seize as much as something you sacrifice. It’s not something to grab; it’s something to give. Time can’t dictate dreams or hijack hope or determine destination. It can’t force us into living anything but what we believe. Time never heals wounds like God does.”

As I pack my bags to attend my second Majestic Women Retreat, I have such an expectation. I believe that as I set aside this time away to spend it with God, it will reap amazingly wonderful astonishing things in my life. As I gift God my time I know it’s in safe hands!

I pray that this weekend you can set aside some time to sit and reflect upon your life and the precious gift of time that has been given to you.

Many Blessings!

‘From The Inside Out’ – Hillsong – YouTube clip

‘Not One Time’ (Spontaneous Worship) – Steffany Gretzinger | Bethel Music – YouTube clip

‘Likeness Of Jesus’ – Jonathan David Helser – YouTube clip

‘At All Times’ (Spontaneous Worship) – Steffany Gretzinger | Bethel Music – YouTube clip

Pic Cred – Rachael Crowe

‘The Broken Way: A Daring Path Into the Abundant Life’ – by Ann Voskamp – Koorong link

The Wall Of Waiting

God promises something but then you ‘hit the wall of waiting’! You enter into a state of limbo: a period of time that has no known end; where you are forced to wait; you have no control; there seems to be no improvement or progress. You can begin to feel cast aside; forgotten; and abandoned!

My wall of waiting feels frustrating! I feel as if I should be doing something more! I feel as if my life is wasting away! Where is my purpose? Where is my direction?

My first state of being in ‘limbo’ was when I was sick. Suddenly all that was normal before was impossible! I couldn’t function as I once was able to. I was deeply frustrated as I couldn’t understand what was going on! I was stuck between sick and healed!

My second time is now – my restoration and transformation phase. It feels as if dreams are racing by like kites and I can’t grasp the string! They simply fly out of reach. I wonder if they will ever return? Will I ever accomplish my calling? I feel like a racehorse stuck in the gate. I desperately want to run and get into the race of life again. But I am stuck between healed and restored. I am stuck between called and anointed release.

Then revelation comes! Jesus experienced ‘limbo land’ or the ‘wall of waiting’. Sent to earth for a purpose he waited around 30 years before he entered into ministry. But during that time he was still faithful to the call upon his life – at the age of 12 he sat in the temple and amazed people with his wisdom.

How can I be faithful during this time? I believe that God cries out for me to rest in Him.  I am to sit by His still life-giving waters. I am to embrace this season of rest. I’m being rebuilt and that takes time! I’m being restored and that requires patience! I’m being made whole and that requires rest!

“God’s goal for us is not merely to change our circumstances–it is to change us! That is the evidence of His unconditional love for you and me.” Christine Caine

I love that quote! This journey has me on my knees before God and I cry out to be changed.

“Lord, I have chosen you alone as my inheritance.

You are my prize, my pleasure, and my portion.

I leave my destiny and its timing in your hands.

Your pleasant path leads me to pleasant places.

I’m overwhelmed by the privileges that come with following you, for you have given me the best!

The way you counsel and correct me makes me praise you more, for your whispers in the night give me wisdom, showing me what to do next.

Because you are close to me and always available, my confidence will never be shaken, for I experience your wrap-around presence every moment.

My heart and soul explode with joy – full of glory!

Even my body will rest confident and secure.

For you will not abandon me to the realm of death

nor will you allow your Holy One to experience corruption.

For you bring me a continual revelation of resurrection life, the path to the bliss that brings me face-to-face with you.” Psalm 16:5-11 The Passion Translation

“We cannot let the difficulty of our circumstances define the faithfulness of our God.” Lysa TerKeurst
Lysa’s words enable me time after time to keep pressing through.

God I trust in Your faithfulness to COMPLETELY restore me and strengthen me!

Jesus I trust in Your faithfulness to complete in me the work that You need to do!

Holy Spirit I trust in Your faithfulness to bring to pass all that you call me to!

From this I believe I will move forward into ALL You call me to!!

Without the restrictions of the past.

Without the doubts!

Without the fears!

Without the feebleness!

You will grow in me a new boldness!

In Your confidence I will walk!

In Your strength I will run the race!

I need to untangle the mess in my mind; in my heart; in my spirit…

Psalm 143:8 is my heart’s cry: Let me hear Your lovingkindness in the morning; let the dawning day bring me revelation of Your tender, unfailing love; tell me in the morning about Your love. Give me light for my path and teach me, for I trust in you; show me what I should do, because my prayers go up to you; teach me the way in which I should walk, for I lift up my soul to You. I trust in You. (NCV, AMP and The Passion Translation paraphrased)

Faced with the ‘wall of waiting’ is hard but God is in the waiting, He is working, so press in and embrace all He has for you.

Many blessings

‘Take Courage’ – Kristene DiMarco – YouTube clip

‘Steady Heart’ – Steffany Gretzinger – YouTube clip

‘Be Still’ – Steffany Frizzell Gretzinger – YouTube clip

A Beast No More

I was very blessed to watch the new “Beauty And The Beast” movie in gold class recently. As soon as my daughter, Sarah, heard they were making the movie she told me that we ‘simply HAD to see it’. Going to gold class was something we had talked about doing for some time, it was exciting to plan it . Leading up to the movie I was reminded of the time I took her to a play of “Beauty And The Beast”. She was 6 years old so when the scary scenes played out she climbed onto my lap.

At the end of the play the cast came out into the foyer for pictures. Sarah was in awe of Belle and quickly ran to her for a picture. But even with the Beast character dressed as a prince Sarah simply wouldn’t approach him. All she could ‘see’ was the ‘beast’ he had been before.

Sickness has plagued me most of my life so it is difficult at times to think and acknowledge that my situation has changed. There have been moments where the ‘beast of sickness’ threatens to roar again. But I am urged to stand fast and hold onto the promise that I am healed; the promise that I am being restored; and I am being transformed!

It might be easy for people to see me back in bed and think of the old me. But I am to think of it no more. I am declaring afresh that I am redeemed.

May I never forget the good things He does for me. He forgives all my sins and heals all my diseases. He has healed me inside and out from every sickness and disease. As promised in Psalm 103:2-3.

The psalm continues and even declares that “He has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west.” Psalm 103:12 New Living Translation (NLT)

Mistakes made this week seemed to bring up every single mistake I’ve ever made! I was drowning in feelings of failure! I felt like the old ‘beast’ had returned. But then I was reminded that God promises: a new covenant – Hebrews 10:16 -17 – the Lord will place His law into my heart and write it upon my mind. God declares He will never again remember my sins and lawless deeds!

There is a song which I just love and this one line really stands out to me: “In the darkest of night you come with the light and restore my identity” – Love Casts Out Fear by Phil King. That one line reminds me that this restoration phase is much more than physical. I am being mentally; emotionally; and spiritually restored (and transformed).

I am reminded that God sees me as His royal daughter. Because I am God’s child I am heir with Christ Jesus to all of Heaven’s riches. It leaves me in a state of awe trying to comprehend these astounding promises.

If you feel like a ‘beast’ drowning in your past, my prayer is that God restores to you the promises He has placed into your heart. That His voice will resound in your heart. That your identity as His royal child – a coheir with Christ Jesus is restored! Ask Him to place upon you His armour starting with the royal crown (helmet) of salvation!

Many Blessings!

Picture Cred – Paweł Furman

“Love Casts Out Fear” – Phil King – YouTube clip

“So Much Grace” – Jonathan & Melissa Helser – YouTube clip

Sleep Where Are You?

It’s so frustrating being unable to sleep! Thoughts race through your mind such as: “oh I’m going to be so tired tomorrow” another might be “oh I won’t be able to function” or “why can’t I sleep? This is so ridiculous!”.

I need sleep! I simply can’t function without a decent amount of sleep! In the depths of my adrenal fatigue night sleep was sometimes impossible. My body would get overtired which would then set my mind racing and then my heart! I tried various things to get to sleep and most failed. The frustration would build and build! But then it changed! After my healing God set me on a path of restoration – yay!!! One key element that I regained was sleep! A decent night sleep was so refreshing!!!

But then I had nights when I was again awake at 2am or 3am, I wondered what was going on! I had a revelation that sometimes prayer is more important than sleep. An urgent prompting to arise and pray was burnt into my spirit. I felt God ask me “how much is a loved one’s life worth to you? How much ransom would you pay if they were taken hostage?”.
Of course you can’t put a price on someone’s life but I know that I would do all I possibly could do to get someone set free from captivity! Guess what?! Prayer can set your loved ones free! Sometimes a loved one is being held captive, they are being held hostage and if they are not rescued the price they will pay is more than their earthly life, it’s their eternal life! Their soul is being held captive! Scary thought that someone’s salvation is at stake! Actually it’s terrifying! It’s even more sobering to realise that you have the key to unlock their prison cell! You have the words that will bring life to their spirit! You have the bounty that will purchase their soul for God!

Whoa that’s powerful! That’s life changing! Not only in this life but for all of eternity!
So what is a few hours lack of sleep worth? It is worth a lot! It can change lives! What are a few hours in comparison to eternity? Not even a blip! So don’t focus on what you’re missing out on (sleep), instead focus on the opportunity you have (praise and prayer). If God has called you to be awake, then He will enable you to cope. He will strengthen you for the coming day! He will equip you with the prayers to pray!

You may be awake because God wants to speak to you and remind you of how much He loves and cares for you! Yay! Awesome! Bask in that! Soak it into your soul! Know that He loves you and cares for you! To be able to soak in God’s love is refreshing and invigorating!

You may be awake to pray for others. Be faithful in that. Write the prayers down and share them with the people you pray for. Send them a message let them know you’re there for them, but more importantly that God is caring for them!

You may be awake because you need to join all of creation in singing songs to the Lord! As the day begins new things burst forth! Be there to grab them! Be there to hear from God! Rejoice in the new day!

Each night I declare that God gives rest to the weary; joy to those mourning; and a sweet refreshing sleep (Jeremiah 31:25-26) and that I will get the right amount of sleep.

So when you find yourself awake in the late hours of night or early hours of the morning ask God why. Then wait, sing a song of praise and open your ears to hear. It will be amazing!!!!

Many blessings

“Be Still” – Steffany Frizzell Gretzinger – YouTube clip

“This Is Not A Test” – TobyMac – YouTube Lyric Video ft. Capital Kings

Living Above Circumstances

Tuesday I had started working on my weekly blog and my theme was based on an everyday God. Whilst imprisoned Paul wrote about how he had learned to be content, through Christ, and satisfied regardless of his circumstances: “….for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content.” Philippians 4:11 (KJV)

In the message version it explains that Paul had discovered something significant: “I’ve found the recipe for being happy whether full or hungry, hands full or hands empty. Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am.” (an excerpt of verses 10-14)

It’s a truly astonishing thing to be content regardless of circumstances, especially when his circumstances would have been very dire!

What was this incredible ‘recipe’ that Paul had discovered and was experiencing in the darkest of places?

Could it be:

That he sensed God was with him.

That he knew his home was in heaven so his current situation was only temporary.

That God was using him even in that place.

He knew his strength, comfort and joy came from the Lord not his current situation!

Was Paul holding onto promises such as this: “My flesh and my heart may fail, But God is the rock and strength of my heart and my portion forever.” Psalm 73:26 (Amplified)

What an inspiration! What a challenge!

As I contemplated this statement I wrote “I hold onto the truth that Paul found hope despite his circumstances, so therefore I can too!!!!”

Wednesday afternoon and evening this statement was tested!

A migraine attack raged in me and I was forced into bed. As I laid there listening to worship music I cried out to God. I rebuked my pain, the nausea and intense tingling in my face and arm. At one stage I thought I’d throw up so I knelt in front on my toilet crying out to God for victory. I asked God to either enable me to vomit – thus purge me or enable me to sleep. I didn’t vomit so I declared that God would give me a sweet refreshing sleep (Jeremiah 31: 25-26).

Thursday I woke up early, when hubby left for the airport, I felt terrible. I put on worship music and then thankfully managed some more sleep. I wasn’t able to get out of bed for breakfast until 8.30 am. I had a terrible headache, I felt very woozy but my vision had returned and the tingling in my face and arm was also gone! Previously migraines like that had progressed and left my left side numb for days, I would also have a constant intense headache and be too woozy to do much at all!

God promises to be my very present help in my time of need: “So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.” Hebrews 4:16 (NLT)

Wednesday night I felt like I was in the fight of my life – for my life. I had made a decision to give my all to God and totally rely on Him,  I felt in that moment I was being tested.  I decided that night that Jesus mattered to me much more than my circumstances or pain! I can boast of the good work that has been done in me by Jesus! I know I have the belt of truth around my waist and no one can remove God’s truth from my life!!

“Only when you begin to trust the Lord and rely on His love and grace will you learn to be content regardless of where you live or how bad your circumstances seem.” Bob George

My circumstances demanded that I wasn’t healed! My body screamed for relief. Only Jesus can complete the good work that has been started! Jesus has healed me and is restoring me! I am being transformed into who God wants me to be! I need to hold onto that NO matter what my circumstances say! NO matter what my body does!

“Anyone who believes in me may come and drink! For the Scriptures declare, ‘Rivers of living water will flow from his heart.’”” John 7:38 (NLT)

I speak words of life over my body to bring it into alignment with God’s promises!

I can sing and I can dance – Because of His great joy

I can laugh and I can rejoice – Because of His amazing grace

Jesus fills me with His joy

Jesus fills me with His grace

I pray that today you can live above your circumstances. That you can grasp onto the great promises that God has given you.

Many blessings!

Pic cred Diana Simumpande

Building 429 – “Impossible” (Official Lyric Video) – YouTube clip

Steven Curtis Chapman – “Warrior” – YouTube clip

Link to “War Room” movie